Relapse

For the past couple days, I've been in a funk. I'm surly, irritable and my heart feels heavy. And I tell people who ask that it's "just one of those days, you know?"

But maybe that's just the easy answer. Deep down, I know that I keep in an iron-clad box the side of my heart that yearns for love beyond the platonic. But every so often, when I let my guard down, I come across someone that inadvertently manages to loosen the deadbolts I have so meticulously set, and out it springs, pouring forth the feelings that are like sweet poison in my veins.

I could describe exactly how this makes me feel in big flowery words, but in the end, we all know exactly how it feels when you simply want someone to love and to hold, but know that it can't happen.

It sucks.